Jan 2014 26

My mom is pregnant by this man I don't approve of. I don't know how to react because she's my best friend, but our relationship hasn't been the same since she started seeing this guy a few months ago. The dislike runs deep into problems that have been going on for a while, but it's too long of a story to get into at the moment. I just know that I can't stay in this house if she has that baby. I don't know where I'll go. My closest relative is 6 hours away so I'd have to leave my entire life behind. Everybody keeps telling me to stop being selfish and to let her live her life because she's gone through a lot for me, but at what point was it okay for her to stop caring for me because she's already done so much? Everybody wants me to pity her because it wasn't planned but she knows quite well how babies are made so why should I pity the fact that the condom broke? That's why there's birth control or other contraceptives. Everybody knows condoms aren't 100% reliable so why should I feel bad for a woman that was well aware of this? Why should I care that she's scared she'll lose me if she keeps the baby when she's allowed me to feel uncomfortable and unvalued for so long. Why should I care that she overheard me talking about moving out and started crying? She hasn't cared for me in months. We haven't had a proper conversation in months. All she cares about is him and his kids. She no longer has the desire to be my mom. She has the audacity to bring him into the house when I know they're having a baby and expects me to acknowledge his presence. Why should I?

[by Anon on Mon February 3, 2014 07:50:02 pm]
You're so right, you deserve better than how your mom is treating you. You're also 100% right that your mother does not deserve your pity: first of all she is a grown woman who knows the consequences of her decisions and you do not need to feel pity for her now that she is facing the consequences of her own decision. She made her bed, now she has to lay in it. However, I don't know how old you are so I don't think you should move out if you haven't at least graduated high school yet. You want the best shot at a happy life, and one day I'm sure you will have a better relationship with your mother, so just bear through it now and when you graduate you can move out, but still keep her in your life. We all leave this world one day, and you don't want to be wishing that you had spent more time with her when you could have. Lastly, I would be kind to the baby, it's not its fault who its daddy is, it's your sister/brother and sisters/brothers are the best friend you could ever have, I'd be excited for that!

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